As you know, it’s not always easy to be sure of yourselves. Failure, shyness, breakup, strict education, doubts, uncertainties or other…we all have our reasons to feel undervalued at one time or another. Ok, everyone cannot feel invicible at all times, it would be arrogance otherwise! We all have the right to crack, it’s normal, it’s human. However, what is abnormal is to never have confidence. And trust me, over time it can quickly spoil your life! You got it, it’s time to react and take control of your life. Here are 15 tips to help you regain the confidence you deserve!
1. List 10 of your qualities! Hold on, it’s not narcissistic. This exercise will allow you to better know your strengths! I will write mine to encourage you. Here are 10 qualities I think I have: kind, well mannered, creative, patient, sensitive, faithful, generous, perseverant, I make good cookies and I have writing skills. See, it’s not so difficult!
2. List 10 of your flaws! Usually, we find our flaws more easily than our qualities. Weird, isn’t it? Or perhaps we are often too hard on ourselves, don’t you think? Now, here are 10 flaws I think I have: shy, clumsy, gourmand, stubborn, oversensitive, too dreamy sometimes, resentful, messy (just in my room, not at work!), angry (it doesn’t happen often) and my sense of orientation is pretty average (never mind, I always end up finding my way!). I know, you’re going to say that I cheat by trying to justify my flaws! But if I minimize them, it means that they are not so problematic, I can live with them. You know what I mean?
3. Transform your flaws, exfoliate them! Nobody is perfect, you know it. Don’t focus on your flaws but on your qualities, you will live better. You can say: “I’m messy but I always find my stuff!”. It’s the most important, right? Better than saying: “I’m such a mess, hope it doesn’t bother you?”. Try to improve your flaws if you want but it’s not a big deal if they don’t disappear. You have to accept them, they are part of your personality. Who knows, some people could even find some of your flaws cute!
4. Accept compliments and believe them! If someone says “You’re pretty today!”, just smile and thank them instead of thinking too much and misinterpreting: “Oh, so you mean that usually I’m ugly?!”. Change your state of mind if you don’t want people to run away. Why would they give you a fake compliment? I know, some of them can use this strategy to ask you something but it’s not always true! Some people can just be really nice. So be thankful and stop being paranoid please!
5. Accept constructive criticism! I’m not talking about nastiness of course! You know, mistakes happen everywhere. If someone criticizes you, it can be for your own good and help you to make progress. Learn from mistakes to move forward and repeat to yourself: “it happened once, it won’t happen twice!” Deal?
6. Write 3 positive statements to boost you every day! Read them and repeat them when you feel the doubt invading you. For example : “Every challenge has a solution.” Inspiring, isn’t it?
7. Force yourself to do things you don’t like once per day! I mean situations you do not feel comfortable with. Careful, it’s not about doing bad things but about challenging yourself! For example, if you are shy, go to a kiosk to buy a magazine and pay it with a note of 50 euros, even if you have coins. Do not apologize for not having coin. The customer is king and the seller will give you change, it’s not a big deal! Another example: if a jerk skips the queue and pass in front of you, tell him that you were there before him, calmly and with a smile to destabilize him. If he doesn’t care, don’t hesitate to raise your voice, you’re doing the right thing. There are witnesses and it is out of question to let anyone walk all over you! Like this, you will be proud of yourself and people will respect you more, it’s a matter of principle.
8. Stay positive! See your problems as challenges. Don’t lose your smile, be strong and do everything possible to solve them! You are the master of your life. Act on things, don’t undergo them!
9. Revise your way to analyze what happens to you! Don’t demean yourself! Minimize the negative things and exaggerate the positive things. You will be happier like this, trust me!
10. Thinking is good, action is better! Be concrete and choose simple actions to move on. Once you have your plan, just realize it step by step!
11. Have a healthy lifestyle! You know the saying “Healthy in Body and Mind”… Think well, do sport, eat healthy. Good shape, good mood, good confidence, it works like this!
12. Have projects and long-term goals! It’s important to have your own dreams. Don’t be afraid to dream big! No matter how long it will take, you will do your best to realize all your projects. Everyone needs motivation to get up every morning, right? Happiness does not just happen, you have to build it day by day. For you to give you the means!
13. Love who you are! If you don’t love yourself, how others could love you? It’s just common sense! You are the master of the image you give to the world, don’t forget it.
14. Stop comparing yourself to others! Being jealous of others won’t make you feel better. Some people are awesome but so do you! Open your eyes and look at yourself in the mirror. You want to be great? Just work on it!
15. Don’t be dependent on the eyes of others! Why would you give them the power to bring you down? They are not God! Show the world that you are strong and independent. You don’t need the approval of others to exist, ok?
Hope these 15 tips will help you to feel more confident, whatever you have to do. Don’t hesitate to give me your opinion, the comment field is yours. Hugs 🙂